Wednesday, December 5, 2018

A Mom's Morning Mayhem

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Every morning, the alarm on my husband's phone starts to go off at 7:00AM and a minute later, the alarm on my phone goes off at 7:00 AM. Our phones must be a minute apart. I sigh as I roll over to turn it off. My husband's is still going. Since I know that once my husband gets into the bathroom, being able to go to the bathroom will have to wait for another fifteen minutes. So I get out of bed and head to the bathroom to relieve myself, wash my hands, and then wake the kids up, telling them that if they don't get up and go now, they'll have to hold their bladder until later.



As I try to sneak down the stairs to start the kid's breakfast, I hear little feet lazily shuffle to the bathroom. Sometimes there is an argument over who goes first, but usually there isn't. After I descend the first small flight, my youngest stands at the top and cries for me to come back; he wants me to give him a piggy back ride down the stairs. I groan and say, "Can't you walk down by yourself?" He cries some more and shakes his head. I turn around and walk down another step which ignites another scream from him. I give up and climb that step again, holding my arms out for him to jump. It's only four stairs to the top of that flight, so I know he'll make it. He shakes his head "no" and points to the step beneath him. I really should tell him to use his words, but I know that it's better to just sit down and let him climb on my shoulders, otherwise the whole morning will consist of meltdowns.



That's usually how my mornings start. Sometimes I make it all the way down the stairs before my four-year-old notices I’m gone. I don't even have to ask anymore what everyone wants. It's usually the same; the oldest wants pancakes, the middle child wants toast with Nutella, and the youngest gets what I give him. To save time, I make a large batch of pancakes during the weekend and freeze the rest that we don't eat so I can microwave it throughout the week.

Everything usually goes well until it's time for the kids to sit down and eat. We have a very specific seating arrangement... No one sits next to each other because when they are together, the kids either play or fight instead of eating. 

I really should get up much earlier to prepare things because this has only gotten worse. Generally, I would give the kids their food in the dining room and then go to the kitchen to pack lunches and load the dishwasher. This was the plan that always worked last year, but now, I have to sit at the dining room table to make sure they are eating. 

My oldest was diagnosed with ADHD last year. He's very social and when he hasn't taken his medicine, he doesn't follow directions. So, even when I'm sitting at the table with my kids, observing them eat, I am still constantly reminding them that they need to keep eating. Eventually, crazy mommy comes out, you know, the one who's voice is high pitched and words are jumbled because she's so frustrated, she can't speak correctly.



I don't mean for her to come out. It's like once I became a mother, I suddenly became like Dr. Jeckle and Mr. Hyde. I start out the morning tired, but sweet, then it's like after the tenth time of saying, "Leave your sister alone! Stop teasing your brother!" I turn into the evil witch that I play as when I'm playing with my kids... Although it's no longer funny, it's serious. My voice is raised and just when I think that I'm going to completely lose my mind, my husband swoops in from the bathroom, all showered and clean, like Mr. Darcy climbing out of the lake at his home in Pemberly and tells the kids, "Listen to your mother." And guess what! They listen to him. His voice isn't booming or particularly deep, but it contains some type authority that my voice somehow lacks. 

Then, like magic, my kids suddenly know what to do with the food placed in front of them. They know how to put their uniforms on and how to brush their teeth. They even know how to put on their socks and shoes. I'm convinced that my husband is the Great and Powerful Oz. You do what he says! 
Once he leaves for work, however, things fall apart all over again. The kids are either yelling at each other or they're playing together nicely, but they aren't listening to me when I say that it's time to grab book bags and head out the door. I shouldn't be surprised that the kids are tardy again for the twentieth time since school started a couple of months ago, but I walk outside and say with disbelief, "I can't believe we're late, again. Please get into the car. Hey! Get in the car, please. GET IN THE CAR!" It's really just the darndest thing.

I think I read somewhere once, that kids behave the worst with their moms. Something about them feeling comfortable with them. I'm glad that I'm someone that they trust and feel comfortable with, but every once in a while, I would also be glad for no morning mayhem.

Does anyone else have similar mornings? Ugh!



30 comments:

  1. I can completely relate! When chaos ensues I try and tell myself that I am still building a relationship with my kids, and i am HUMAN. We aren't perfect. I am sure one day my kids will tell stories of my antics!

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  2. My boys are always up before me and make their own breakfast. My youngest wakes me up to sign his planner and they head off to school. They are 10 and 12 so that does make a difference.

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    1. I wish that they all like cereal. They're so weird. lol.

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  3. Haha that's so funny that they're so obedient when your husband talks to the kids. I hope your mornings get better!
    xoxo
    Annie

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  4. As a teacher, it's unfortunately something that has to be started early on and kept that way forever. When kids come into a classroom, they are expected from day one to push in their chairs, raise their hands, keep their bodies to themselves, and sit quietly. It's an authoritative, "I don't put up with this" sort of stance and if you let yourself get soft, even just once, your children will suddenly think "Oh, the rules she puts in place don't actually matter".

    Now, of course we aren't perfect and we don't want to be the boring strict parent so there are some tricks you can do to help! I like to promise rewards for doing a good job or even better just surprise them with a thank you prize. In the classroom, it's a few goldfish or a sticker. At home perhaps you can say, hey, thanks for being so great this morning, let's get icecream after school. Let them know you appreciate their good behavior and you won't feel as stressed about yelling at them.

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    1. Thanks for the great tips! My oldest has been doing better at listening, but in the mornings before he's had his medicine, he can't keep his hands to himself. He HAS to play and tell stories. I get it, he's been asleep for 8 hours and hasn't burned off that energy. Most of our morning issues come forth because he just can't stop and it winds the other kids up.

      I have to remind him that there's a time and place for it, but he forgets. He definitely responds to rewards whether it be me saying, "If you eat your breakfast and get dressed without bothering your brother and sister, then you can pick out a movie tonight," or offering a special treat after school, but he has to be still long enough to hear it.

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  5. I hope your mornings get better, though! It's really cute that they listen to your husband! Have a great week!

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    1. It's really just a mix of days. Last year, my youngest rode the bus to school much earlier. I would just wake him up, get him dressed, and then put him on the bus. The school gives breakfast to all the students, so he'd eat there. This year, his bus comes later and so he wants to play with big brother.

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  6. I'm sorry that your mornings seem so rough! I'm about to have a baby so I don't have this experience yet, but I'll let you know if I do!

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    1. Thanks! I was hoping for this post to me more comedic and relatable. I see now, that perhaps it wasn't as funny as I thought.

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  7. My morning is so spontaneous. I don't entertain new thoughts. I will wake up at 4am to cook breakfast and then my three school kids' lunch and recess. We will leave the house by 530 so I could bring them to school. I will be home. By 8am to clean the house, cook lunch and dinner and look after my two toddlers..

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    1. Wow! You must live far from the school. I guess I don't have it so bad if I can wake up at 7. Ouch!

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  8. Interesting article about Mom’s Mayhem. Gives us insight about a day in your life with your family.

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  9. We definitely have similar mornings. We have 5 kids and three of them go to school. They eat breakfast at school, but the getting up and getting ready parts definitely are more difficult than what I like them to be. There is definitely always one meltdown a morning, one fight, one over sleeper, one that doesn't want to listen, etc. I understand your morning mayhem.

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    1. All of our kids could eat breakfast at school, but my oldest's medicine makes him lose his appetite, so I try to make sure that he eats before he goes, and really, that's most of my frustration right there.

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  10. Relationships are so funny. You're right, as a kid I would never listen to my mom, but if dad popped his head into the room and said something, then I did it right away. I don't know if it's the fact that they spend more time with mom, so they know your weaknesses just a little bit better or what, but yeah, I imagine just one morning of order would be nice.

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  11. I completely understand trying to sneak out of bed to get things done before the kids wake up. I have two boys and sometimes I get about 30 min. of house chores done before my oldest wakes up. Once my oldest wakes up he wants food so I make enough for both of my boys. This helps a lot and saves time because my youngest usually wakes up in a bad mood and food just helps him get in a better mood.

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    1. I need to just make myself wake up early. That would help, but darn it! I want to sleep too!. Haha

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  12. I looked at the picture and was like, "is that coffee or wine?" Haha. (Just kidding.)
    Mornings are so tough. My kids are only 3 and almost 2 and getting out the door to daycare or to a playgroup is such a struggle. My crazy mommy comes out every morning as well. Mornings are just too much.

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  13. I am not a mum but my best friend is and this post is an accurate representation of her life. Mornings are indeed very though.

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    1. Mornings are tough fro anyone who isn't a morning person. I used to be a morning person and I would drive everyone crazy with my constant chatter. Roles have been reversed.

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  14. I'm not a mom either but the best way to live is in the moment and to try and not worry about the small things too much. xo, Suzanne

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    1. That's very true, but I swear, the feel judged more as a mom than I ever did before I became one. It's so much easier to stress about it.

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  15. Interesting article about Mom’s Mayhem. I hope your mornings could become better. Mornings are much tough for most of the moms I think.

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